Let's Do The Time Warp Again...

In my Saturday morning spin class we were climbing a hill...up in third position (standing), tension to the max, my eyes closed...i try to breath, go...go...go....awwww I remember this song...."Lips Like Sugar....Sugar Kisses...

I am immediately back in sophomore year high school...school dance, this song starts playing, our gazes meet across the dance floor, we smile, we walk that slow motion walk, my hands land softly on his shoulder, we start to dance and the song ends!!!! What was that...the radio edit edited version???

Time warp to now....

HOLYFUCKINGSHIT!  HOWLONGISTHISSONG!!!  Did he pick the "Stairway To Heaven" version? I'M DYING...I literally am sucking wind, wanting to punch my instructor in the face, can't hold on...this is FOREVER!!!!!  Finally the song ends...I am on an endorphin high...and it hits me!  Time Warps DO exist!

This soooo didn't happen to me when I was single...is this some weird thing that happens when you become a mom?  Seriously...WTH!

Example 1:
Watching an hour long episode of Phineas & Ferb all of us curled up on the couch...MILLISECOND!  What do you mean that was an hour!!!

In an hour long spin class..ETERNITY! That was SOOOO longer than 60 minutes, I don't care what that clock says!


Example 2:
Playing Connect Four with the most awesome 5 year old - umm, ok, who messed with my phone, that was NOT 30 minutes.

That same 5 year old screeching in his room because he didn't listen again....FOR...EV...ER!!! and now I'm deaf too!

Example 3:
The hours between 11 pm - 5:45am.  NO...that CAN'T be my alarm...I just got INTO bed 10 minutes ago!!!

The 60 minutes between 2pm-3pm.  What the hell...did I murder someone...sheesh! I am doing time! 

I'm sure you other moms have other examples too!

How does one call  NASA, or  JPL, or Cyberdyne...okay..maybe not Cyberdyne, I don't need to activate Skynet!  How do I contact Dr. Frank N. Furter to discuss his findings?

 Can I reverse these time warps and make the bad last seconds and the good last for days?

Very serious questions from a Sudden Mother, but until then....

It's Just A Jump To The Left...